He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Randomize
