guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
