you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
