And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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