Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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