Just fell off a train. Bad.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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