he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
my sisters under your porch take her home
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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