Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
actually, I'm a sock model
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
