He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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