im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
