those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Randomize