dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
