I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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