i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
