:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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