He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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