Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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