In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
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