My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Randomize
