Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
