I'm drive I can fine osifer
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
