she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
