So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
