Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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