i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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