I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
