I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
