yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Randomize
