is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
He kissed a someone with a penis
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
