Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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