I only kidnapped one of them. chill
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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