They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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