We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
