no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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