If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
