if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Damn victory sex feels great
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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