At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
