and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
