the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
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