Screwed.edu
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
PANTIES FOUND
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