A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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