Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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