Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
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