Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
