I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
