I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
