but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
