My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Randomize
