oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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