walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize